


Still Breathing

by PotionsMistressM



Category: Angel: the Series
Genre: Angst, F/M, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2009-01-04
Updated: 2009-01-04
Packaged: 2017-10-12 04:18:50
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 458
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/120688
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PotionsMistressM/pseuds/PotionsMistressM
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Both Faith and Wesley have regrets, but they're working through them.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Still Breathing

**Author's Note:**

>   
> **Title** : Still Breathing  
>  **Series** : _Buffy the Vampire Slayer_ , _Angel_  
>  **Characters** : Faith Lehane/Wesley Wyndham-Price  
>  **Additional Notes** : For [](http://grrarrg0908.livejournal.com/profile)[**grrarrg0908**](http://grrarrg0908.livejournal.com/), who requested a post BtVS season 7/ pre Angel season 5 with Faith and Wes (I'm a little rusty on my later seasons of _Angel_ so forgive any errors- also I assumed that Faith somehow knew about Fred and Gunn offing Fred's ex-professor). Hope it's alright!

Still Breathing  
Sure, she had helped save the world, but Wesley was not fooled when she'd explained away her sudden appearance as an act of gratitude. Of course it had been nice- a vindication- for her to thank him, to show him that his work as her Watcher had been valuable after all.

But Faith had never been the thankful type, had she?

She had also never been the type to ask for help, even when she badly, badly needed it. She was willful, pigheaded, and desperate to prove herself.

And somehow she had known that Wesley Windham-Price was the only one in the entire world who would understand any of what she was going through. She'd been through the whole you're-never-done-repenting speech before with Angel, and she knew that she wasn't seeking to be forgiven. Not really. The blood of those little girls would be on her hands until the day she died- and probably well after that if she was going to believe what Sister Mary Margaret had always droned on about before Faith had been expelled from her school. Faith would never be forgiven. Not for that guy in Sunnydale, not for the girls, not for any of the other many and varied crimes she'd ever committed. And she was cool with that. She got it. She could do the eternal repentence thing.

She didn't need to be absolved. She needed to be understood.

Angel had the excuse of being a soulless monster while he did all of his nasty crap. Gunn and Fred could claim revenge. Buffy... well, she never did _anything_ wrong, did she? Hell, Faith could even write off her own first foray into homicide as an unfortunate accident. None of them could know what she felt every day; none of them could see that bomb explode inside her mind every single night. No one else knew what it was like to have taken something completely helpless and innocent and destroyed it.

No one but Wes.

Pacing the hotel office, Faith stopped short and picked up a framed photo from Angel's desk. Wes had no need to ask which one it was as Faith looked at it wistfully, absentmindedly traced the scene with her finger, and then sighed. Returning Connor's baby photo to its place of origin, she looked up at Wesley and held his gaze. Both were polite enough to ignore the shining, unspilled tears in the other's eyes.

"When does it stop hurting?" she whispered, her voice tight and strained from the effort of not crying. Never breaking her stare, Wesley only shrugged and moved to pick up the same photo. As he repeated Faith's earlier tracing motions with something akin to reverence, Wes muttered his own answer.

"It doesn't."


End file.
